Fuck You.

Hopefully, for my own sanity’s sake, I’ll be completely over and done with these hate-filled, ridiculous blog posts some day.

But today is not one of those days.

For those that know me in real life, you are [probably] well aware that I put up with absolutely zero bullshit. Don’t even try – you will not succeed. I think that comes from all the years that I was a pushover to men. If someone liked me, paid me the slightest bit of attention, I was all mush and a fucking doormat. When my ex and I broke up, I sacked up [to use a masculine term] and started with a no-nonsense approach to men*.

When it comes to guys I encounter in my life now, do one thing wrong and you’re out. I don’t have time for your excuses, your bullshit, whatever it is. Just don’t even try to fuck with me. I’m not having it.

It’s just weird that, a year and a half after our break-up, my ex is still giving me bullshit. Sort of indirectly. But I’d really like him to disappear – poof – into the wind, never to be heard from again. Alas…this won’t happen**.

So, with no-bullshit attitude I have, even the smallest things just set me off. Hey, maybe it’s the hormones*** – but who really knows. Either way, he pissed me off tonight…and didn’t even have to try very hard.

I was reading the Facebook wall of a mutual friend of ours, and I saw the ex had recently posted something. But I couldn’t click on his name, and couldn’t see his picture – though I could still see his name and what he wrote. I know he had de-friended me back in the spring [which was really a blessing, actually], but this now meant he had blocked me. There is no way for me to search for him, message him, see our mutual friends – nothing. Not that I want to, but seriously – what was the point of him blocking me? Had I done anything wrong to him? Had I emailed or otherwise contacted him or his fiancee at any point since he told me he was engaged in January? No, I had not. I left him completely alone. HE is the one who wanted to be friends, and keep in touch, and all that bullshit. I have a feeling, though, that he got the hint that I didn’t feel the same say when he possibly read the Facebook event I made celebrating the year anniversary of me getting rid of “the douchebag toolbag ex who none of my friends and family liked anyway.” It was shortly after this event was published that I noticed we were no longer “friends.” 

Whatever. Just…fuck you, dude. FUCK YOU. I’m trying to move on with my life and not be so mad at the way you basically lead me on to think you really loved me, just to get me to move to Boston, pay half the bills, cook and clean, have sex once a week [at most - you know, whenever you wanted to], and betray me the way you did. And YOU have the gall to block ME! I’d block you back, but I don’t give a SHIT what you think about me. Hell, I’d let you see my whole fucking profile, just to make sure you know how much happier I am and how much better my life is without you.

But I’m pretty sure you already know.

One more thing: I pray to God that you won’t be moving to DC next year after you graduate, because that is my plan. If I see you around Capitol Hill, I may not be able to keep my right hook from connecting with your face. Just a heads up.

 

FOOTNOTES:
* And dating – which may be why I’m still single, almost a year and a half later. Regardless.

** …yet. He does have a serious blood disease where he basically has no immune system. So, should the apocalypse come, he’d be one of the first to die…ooh, is that too cruel?

*** I am about 5 days out from my period – and I do have a history of depression, which I believe exacerbates my PMS to a point just shy of homicidal rage towards men.

Realization.

I have come to realize that:

- Men are shallow, terrible creatures.
- I can’t be friends with them. 
- They piss me off. All of them.
- I can’t have friendships with men like I have with women because they fucking suck and are incapable of having deep, meaningful connections.**
- Everything they say is wrong, stupid, or both.
- You can only count on them to let you down.
- They make you feel like an idiot for having feelings.
- They are really only good for one thing. And most of the time that isn’t even worth it. I can stay home with my hot pink vibrator and not have to worry about some dude getting jizz on my sheets. Or having to fake an orgasm.

So now that I’m utterly exhausted from hating so much, I’m going to pull up my Hulu queue and hope to God that last week’s episode of The Office is funny as shit. Then I’m passing out. Maybe a solid eight will de-funk me and I’ll be better in the morning.

I pray this is the case. I don’t like being this way, but recent events [one right after another right after another] have left me no room for not going insane.

FUCK DUDES.

**This applies to all men, except maybe you, Justin. But we both know you’re much more like a woman than a man. And I mean that as a compliment. You’re also like a brother to me, and family gets exemptions.

The Rhode Island hate continues…

Through my blog stats, I found this Craigslist website that refers readers to my blog entitled “Fuck Rhode Island.” Here is the CL posting:

Title: Pawtucket Registry

GOD, anyone been to this registry lately?? This place sum’s up Rhode Island to a “T” 
I have Never (NEVER) in my life seen such a large group of degenerates in my entire life. If it wasnt for the white trash welfare cases I would have thought I ended up in a 3rd world country. 
I could actually smell the famous RI project smell on the clothes of the woman standing behind me. (anyone who has ever been to a project for any reason will only know what Im talking about) They all smell the same, so do the people. Its a “stank” that your nose will remember for life. 
Man, Im serious, I already had a shit copinion of RI before but today topped it off. I’d bet 90+% of all individuals in there today were on welfare….. and it was friggin PACKED. 
Slow moving, slow thinking, no manners, no class, no sense of responsibility, just plain ol’ nasty. Their idea of communication about things they don’t agree with or simply don’t undersatnd will be answered with the word: “Whhhaaahhh” now, you have to listen closely for the different ways they say “Whhhaaahh” (also known to humans as (what) – Because the “whhhhhhaaahhh” is Rhode Islands own type of cave man grunting and you must listen and watch the facial expressions to understand what they want, or what the level of anger in the complaint is about- 
The worst part of these people is that most of them had 1-2 children to pick up where they left off when they croak. I hate this place!!!! 
Has anyone ever read this before? I feel so much better knowing some people agree with me. 

http://basedinboston.wordpress.com/2008/07/03/fuck-rhode-island/ 

Thank you, dear stranger, for hating that turd of a state [and all the assholes living in it] as much as I do.

Rhode Island, Part III

OK. So. Since I wrote my original rant about my hatred for Rhode Island, I have checked my blog stats and consistently see where people have searched “I hate Rhode Island,” or “Why I Hate RI,” and even “Fuck Rhode Island.” There was even a Rhode Island, Part II.

I want to know who you people are and why you hate Rhode Island so much.

I have my reasons [a whole blog's-worth] but am curious about the rest of the country…or world, for that matter. Do you hate Rhode Island because of a particular person you met from there that was a douchebag? Did you have a bad incident there? Do you hate RI because of their stupidity and racism? Do you hate RI because of its diminutive size, and the fact that it is the smallest state in the nation [and thus should just be enveloped into a neighboring state's landmass]? Do you hate Rhode Island because it picked on you in middle school and stole your lunch money?

Share your thoughts and opinions here. Let the hate flow through you. Then let’s form some kind of posse, go down to the border of Mass or CT and the “Ocean State” [ha] and set fire to that fucker. Or maybe, for the pacifists in the group, let’s just meet at a coffee shop and bitch a little bit about that stupid state. We should be supporting each other in this journey of loathing. For it is a journey — oh yes, it is.

And one last time, so everyone can hear it:

FUCK RHODE ISLAND.

Rhode Island, Part II

While checking my blog stats, I saw that someone found my blog about my hatred for Rhode Island by searching for “Rhode Islanders are stupid.”

Good to know I’m not the only one who feels this way.

Thank you, kind stranger, for sharing my hatred for the residents of the Ocean State. If you come back, tell me your story!!

Fuck Rhode Island.

You know, I’m a fairly easy-going girl. I like most things, and will at least try to like most things. But when I hate something, I hate with the fire of a thousand suns.

And I hate Rhode Island.

Basically, every aspect of Rhode Island, and everyone who lives in it, sucks. I regret that I feel this way, since my state shares a border with crummy RI, and I must traverse this tiny, insignificant state whenever I go visit my Mom. I had to drive through it today on my way to Washington, DC for July 4th. Every minute was horrible. HORRIBLE!

Perhaps I should pinpoint the reasons why I hate Rhode Island so much:

1) I left Massachusetts today and as I crossed the border into Rhode Island, it started pouring rain. And not just regular “pouring rain,” it was dumping buckets so hard I couldn’t see in front of me. So there I was, travelling down I-95, the odometer barely creeping up to 30 mph, hazards blinking, straining to see the road signs, yelling “HOLY FUCK” at constant intervals. This went on for half an hour. Needless to say, it wasn’t pretty. FUCK RHODE ISLAND and its crappy weather.

2) Rhode Islanders drive like douchebags. Now, if any of you aren’t from the Northeast, you probably think we’re alldouchebags when we’re behind the wheel of a car. Not true. A “Masshole” is very different from a stupid Rhode Islander. A Masshole thinks his agenda is the most important agenda of everyone on the highway, and will make you feel like an idiot for delaying his arrival to meet his friend at Dunkin’ Donuts, or wherever the fuck he’s going, by speeding past you and maybe cutting you off. A stupid Rhode Islander simply can’t drive — first they tailgate endlessly, then operate their vehicles like they’re having epileptic seizures, and scare the shit out of you. Why, Rhode Islanders? Why can’t you just back the fuck off and chill the fuck out? Because you suck. So FUCK RHODE ISLAND and its crappy drivers.

3) I needed to take a bathroom break, and I was right near Warwick, RI. Not thinking anything of it, I exited the highway and found the nearest fast food joint, used the facilities, and expected to jump right back on the highway. Nope. Wouldn’t you expect the southbound entrance to I-95 to be near where you got off the highway originally? I sure would. But apparently no one in the great state of Rhode Island got that memo. They make you drive all through their crappy town, get stuck at stoplights, and tailgated by their stupid residents, and twenty minutes later you finally stumble upon the highway, miles and miles away from where you got off. Why?? It makes absolutely no sense to me. So FUCK RHODE ISLAND and its illogical highway construction.

Hmm, I’m on a roll here! Well, I am done with reasons why I hate Rhode Island for now, but there are other things I hate:

1) I hate people who go the speed limit in the passing lane [also called the fast lane, or left lane]. It’s called the “passing” lane for a reason — you should be passing the cars to the right of you, not the other way around. Assholes.

2) I hate people who brake on the highway. If you have to brake because the person in front of you slowed down, that means you’re too close. Back the fuck off. Douchebags.

3) I hate New Jersey. Actually, for many of the same reasons I hate Rhode Island. The one redeeming factor is the Jersey Turnpike — like a not-quite-drunk-enough guy screwing an ugly chick, I can get in and out fast.

4) I hate clowns. They creep the shit out of me.

All this hating has made me tired. [Yawn] Good night!